Bik's Week 4 Thursday Pick: Replacing Life

HUZZAH! THE ORIGINAL REFS ARE BACK (more on this tomorrow in Friday’s feature). But after the debacle that was Monday Night Football and the rapid resolution of the situation, here’s a What If list of other Replacement Scenarios, along with an estimated timeline:

• Replacement Reindeer (Dec 26^th): Imagine trying to explain to kids that Santa was too cheap to front some cash for Rudolph and the crew so in the meantime we have replacement reindeer that don’t have the power and precision that the original reindeer have. No guarantees they get to your house in time for a kid to wake up.

• Replacement Pilots (About 15 flights worldwide): It’s almost immeasurable how much of a catastrophe this would be. Remember that scene in “Snakes On A Plane” when Russ Tyler (the actors name is actually Kenan Thompson and he’s great on SNL but he’s forever Russ Tyler to me from his D2: Mighty Ducks days)  takes over the plane when its careening towards the ground. Now imagine every flight being like that – but without Samuel L. Jackson

• Replacement Cops (2 weeks): Those first few days would be hilarious because the public wouldn’t know how far they could push the limits, and the cops with really no fear of reprimands could really push the limits their own way. But after a while the public would realize, much like we did with the replacement officials, that they don’t know all the laws and it would be chaos.

• Replacement Players (A Month): Wait – DON’T GIVE GARY BETTMAN IDEAS! DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!

Onto the Week 4 Picks.

Home Team is in CAPS.

Browns (+12) over RAVENS

I want to rate this game as a loss for everybody. The Browns are maybe the worst team in the league. If you don’t have anything nice to say about a team you shouldn’t say anything about them.

So why am I taking the Browns? This is the Ravens 4^th game in 17 days. Take a second to read that again. 4^th National Football League Game in 17 days. What an immense toll that puts on your body. To compare that to let’s say Arizona who will finish their 4^th game this Sunday in a span of 28 days. The physical toll that is going to have on the beleaguered Ravens could result in some sloppy play allowing the Browns to flirt with that 13 points long enough to keep them in it. Not to mention the potential let down game after a Sunday Night Game versus New England that was controversial in its own right. So with the regular officials back, we might not see the home teams be the beneficiary of scared replacement refs (Seriously – what if the Official on Monday Night was just scared to say it was an interception?) What better way to welcome them back with some favourable calls to the away team leading to another spirited chant by the Ravens Fans.

Last week: 7-8-1

Season: 24-22-2